Lest I forget - coincidence, happenstance, and a blinking miracle

Lest I forget - coincidence, happenstance and a blinking miracle...

I recalled my grandson's disappearance and reappearance on another site this afternoon.

My grandson’s disappearance on Sunday, May 19 2009, and reappearance this morning suggests too many coincidences.

There is absolutely no comparison to how I felt at 6 am and 7-15 am this morning.

At 6 am I felt deeply concerned and beginning to think of the worst possible scenario in relation to my grandson’s disappearance. I’m not a deeply religious person, but I don’t discount the power of prayer either. I believe a number of prayers were made across the Pacific Ocean to seek a higher power to bring Kellie home to us.

Do you believe in coincidences? How many can possibly go together? Once is a coincidence, twice is a happenstance and thrice is a blinking miracle!

What made Kellie’s grandmother’s niece’s husband decide to go to work this morning after making a decision not to earlier? He became the right person at the right time to drive through that particular roundabout just after 7 am this morning. As he drove through young Kellie was walking through in the other direction. Coincidence? Kellie had apparently been walking back from Wellington City about ten miles away at that time of the morning. Coincidence?

We had all believed that Kellie had gone bush on Sunday afternoon, and was in the eastern hills above Taita, Lower Hutt. Kellie had actually gone into Wellington City on his own for the first time on Sunday and spent the next night and day there, returning to the Hutt Valley early this morning. We don’t know who he met or saw there. He had some money and probably bought something to eat and some Coca Cola, his favourite, to drink. He had also been under cover from the elements somewhere - his clothing was dry but his shoes damp from walking beside the rail line. Another coincidence?

At 7-15 am this more I was a much happier man and grandfather after learning he was on his way home in a police patrol car. The local daily newspaper, the Dominion Post, who will be writing a story about Kellie’s disappearance and reappearance tomorrow, sent a camera-man to take a few shots for tomorrow’s issue. Lance, the niece’s husband is the hero of the hour and was photographed with Kellie and his grandmother. Grandfather stayed in the background because getting photographed for newspapers is not his scene.

Coincidence, happenstance and a blinking miracle

Our special needs grandson's difficult journey to adulthood

We have been raising our special needs grandson for eight and a half years now, since he was eight years old. He has had severe learning and behavioural problems. He was brought to us by our national welfare agency - CYFS - for an emergency placement with us.

Nobody would listen to us about his condition, despite being assessed by his paediatrician at the age of six years. He was assessed with ADHD and comorbid conditions of conduct disorder and oppositional defiance, a minor intellectual handicap which was enough to, according to his doctor, knock him off balance, and severe learning difficulties. He was prescribed, and used Ritalin until he was 14 years old. He cannot read and write at the age of 16 years. His numeracy is much better than his literacy.

He was finally suspended from school at the age of 15 years. He showed aggressiveness - he was physically prevented from leaving a room and reacted accordingly. He was actually a victim of the professional arrogance of senior teachers, a rigid educational system and a reluctance of politicians to grant an increase in the educational vote to special education in New Zealand.

He and school are finally parted now- senior teachers woud never accept what we told them in relation to his learning and his behaviour. They claimed he was fully responsible for his actions, - and I knew he wasn't! However his teachers aides were more sympathetc and helpful, but of course could never directly challenge the authority of the senior teachers.

Early in 2006 he suffered a psychotic episode and wound up in an adolescent psychiatric unit for four weeks. Naturally I won't discuss the reasons why here, but he has been on medication ever since. It has been reduced to a very low dosage, and his ADHD symptoms, which had been suppessed by his medication, have returned, but not to the levels of his younger years. His medication should be permanently stopped in a few months providing there is no relapse.

We now have a young man of 16 years, going on 17 years to help onto his next stage in life. We won't be handicapped by arrogant senior teachers or other know-all's impedng his progress.

After a number of meetings in recent months with various health, welfare and community agencies, our opinions and beliefs have been vindicated, and we can now move forward knowing we all sing from the same song sheet. This can be only good for the young man in question, our grandson.

Since I originally wrote this post on another site, our grandson has had another psychotic relapse and is a very, very ill young man. We wanted him admitted to the youth centre at Rangatahi, but sadly he had to spend two unfortunate weeks at the adult mental health unit at Hutt Hospital. He is getting the best possible treatment at Rangatahi now, and undoubtably will be there for number of weeks.

He has been home again for some time and is being treated by a local doctor and support group. We anticipate a better deal all round. An official complaint has been lodged against Hutt Valley health's CAFS Department.